Getting Along Before She Got Along
It has been a long time since I have had to negotiate living arrangements with a woman. I found the items below amusing. I also recognized them from my past.
Two things you should know about me.
1. I am passive-aggressive .
2. The more people demand something of me, the less I do it when asked.
Those are probably just one thing.
The second thing might be. I hate conflict. It is usually for this reason I am motivated to meet a demand.
"Fine!"
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
"Five Minutes."
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
"Nothing."
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin in Nothing usually end in Fine.
"Go Ahead."
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it!!
"Loud Sigh."
This is not quite a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about Nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of Nothing.)
"That's Okay."
This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's Okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
"Thanks."
Don't read anything into this. Do not question it. Do not faint. Just say, "You're welcome." Sometimes that works.
"Whatever!"
Meaning screw you! Don't worry about it;
"I got It."
This is something a woman has told a man to do several times but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, refer to #3.
I wish I had been better at reading the verbal cues!
posted by Tossing Pebbles in the Stream @ 8:58 a.m.
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7 Comments:
Brilliant Philip!
I am all of those! :o)
I think I am pretty low maintenance and sometimes I fall into the category of "anything for an easy life" I give in too easily or I won't stake my claim if it's going to hurt someones feelings... I guess I'm a pushover unless it involves anyone taking advantage of my kids...then I am FIERCE! :o)
Enjoyed this post!
No one ever has to guess what I am thinking or how I feel. I am very quick to open my mouth and let them know. LOL
Philip,
You have this pegged pretty good. lol I didn't know there was a man on earth that could read these signs. Kudos to you. lol
I am another, like Peggy, who says exactly what I think. People know exactly where I stand.
Take care my friend. I got a chuckle out of this one.
Blessings,
Mary
Hehehe ! but nothing fits on me ! and... maybe I am the only woman in the world but 5 min are 5 min with me !
Hee hee. Actually I'm like you. Passive-agressive. I hate being EXPECTED to do something. And I have been known to quit jobs to avoid conflict.
Those are funny lines. I try not to be guilty of any of them, but I guess you'd better ask the Mountain Man!
Sounds like you do know women pretty well. :)
I note that thus far all your commenters here have been women--and none has disputed your meanings.
Hmmmm--well, it may have something to do with the fact that women are verbal and use words to process.
Not sure all your meanings apply to me--I usually need to keep talking to communicate. All the examples you used are conversations ENDINGS.
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